So, where would the President & VP go for a all-American restaurant now?

(Note:  The following conversation between President Obama and Vice President Biden is fictional… but it maybe happening now. You never know.)

Pres:  Joe, I’m pissed off at the idea that Burger King is merging with Tim Horton’s and moving their HQ to Canada.  How dare they try to take advantage of a lower tax rate?

VP:  So want do you want to do about it, Mr. President?

Pres: Joe, we have to find an all-American National chain restaurant that cater to progressive politician like ourselves but show the American people that we care about good old American values.

VP:  But Mr. President, I wanted to go to Nando’s tonight!

Pres: Joe, this is important!  How about we go to Chipotle?

VP:  Do you remember the last time we went there how you almost started a national incident by going over the food shield?  They told you never to come back!  Plus Chipotle is still 2 years away from getting rid of potential GMOs.

Pres:  Shoot, you’re right Joe!!  How about McDonalds?

VP:  With Michelle raging war against obesity & Happy Meals?  Plus that clown creeps me out!

Pres:  Good point.  Chick-Fil-A?

VP:  Homophobic.

Pres: KFC?

VP:  PETA still hates them for how they kill chickens.  You might as well cross Popeye’s off the list as well.

Pres: How about that new Mission BBQ place now opening up across the region?

VP:  They support the police, fire fighters, and the military.  Might not be a good look supporting police during the Ferguson crisis.  Plus, BBQ isn’t exactly healthy eating…

Pres:  Man, that takes out Red, Hot, & Blue and Famous Dave’s as well!  What about Arby’s?

VP:  Have you seen their new ads basically supporting gobs of meat?

Pres: I know, Denny’s!

VP:  They refused serving African-Americans many years ago.  Might as well go to Cracker Barrel or Bob Evans if you want to piss off your base.

Pres:  How about a Pizza?  Papa John’s?

VP:  Do you remember how Papa John fought you over Obamacare?

Pres:  I guess that also eliminates Pizza Hut, Olive Garden, Red Lobster, and Longhorn Steakhouse as well.

VP:  Heck, any similar chain restaurant from Applebee’s and IHOP to Chili’s to the Outback chain and even Friday’s can be eliminated!

Pres:  Joe’s Crab Shack?

VP:  This close to a seafood-loving state like Maryland?  That’s heresy!

Pres:  Wendy’s?

VP:  Dave Thomas—fat guy!

Pres:  Hardee’s?  Waffle House?

VP:  Too redneck-y!

Pres:  Golden Corral?

VP:  Have you seen the reports of their unsanitary conditions?

Pres:  Taco Bell?

VP:  Here a hint… The beef isn’t exactly beef.

Pres:  Buffalo Wild Wings?

VP:  Too many TVs!  Not green enough for my tastes.

Pres:  Five Guys?

VP:  Peanut allergies.

Pres:  Subway?  It’s healthy…

VP:  Their bread isn’t.

Pres:  Ruth’s Chris?

VP:  Too rich!

Pres: Steak ‘n Shake?

VP:  Do you see a Steak ‘n Shake anywhere near here, Mr. President?

Pres:  Perkins?

VP:  Nothing good can come from a visit there.  Ask Tiger.

Pres:  Friendly’s?

VP:  Will you be serious, Mr. President!!

Pres:  Well, shoot Joe, there really isn’t a place we can go as progressive politicians but show we can support an all-American restaurant!

VP:  (thinks about it for a second)  Well, there is ONE place we could go.  I hear Teddy (Kennedy) loved it!

Pres:  Really?  What?

VP:  Nah, it might not be a good idea…

Pres:  Joe, I’m desperate here.  I’ll take anything.

VP:  All right, but I don’t like suggesting it.  Hooters.

Pres:  HOOTERS?

VP:  Yes, Mr. President.  Hooters.

Pres: (thinks for a moment)  Screw it, I’m hungry for some wings anyways.  Let’s go, Joe!

The end of a Baseball Broadcasting Era…

Pete Van Wieren died this weekend at the age of 69.  To many fans who listened to him on WSB-AM radio or watched him on WTBS back in the 1980s, he, alongside Skip Caray & Ernie Johnson Sr., formed the heart of the Atlanta Braves’ broadcasting team from the mid 1970s through 1989.  This trio was considered to be among the best in the game.  Ernie was the storyteller, Skip had the quick wit, and Pete was “The Professor”.  Now they are all gone.

All three should be enshrined in Cooperstown next year or soon.  Without these three who transitioned seamlessly for radio to TV and vice versa on a nightly basis for over a decade, baseball might have never graduated from a radio-only sport.  Yes, NBC had a Saturday Game of the Week, and ABC had a Monday night game for a time, but without the innovation of Ted Turner to show all 162 regular season games on TV of one MLB team, I don’t think we would have seen the proliferation of Region Sports Networks.  And you can largely thank Ernie, Skip, and Pete for that. 

There may have been announcing teams that could match the Braves trio.  Marty Brennaman and Joe Nuxall come to mind on WLW in Cincinnati.  Harry Caray & Steve Stone working Cubs games for WGN were another dynamic duo.  Ernie Harwell and Paul Carey on WJR in Detroit.  Jack Buck and Mike Shannon on KMOX in St. Louis.  And Vin Scully in Los Angeles is still his own one-man band, covering Dodger baseball since the Brooklyn days when Jackie Robinson was still playing…

But Ernie, Skip, and Pete were the first to make the transition to TV on a nightly basis, and no one could transition smoothly from a loss to the TBS late night movie like they could.  John Sterling, the current voice of the New York Yankees, knows this firsthand.  He worked with the trio covering Braves games in the mid-1980s.

A couple of years ago, I visited Atlanta and caught a Braves game on radio, listening to the current “deans” of Braves’ broadcasters, Joe Simpson & Don Sutton.  My dad hates these two announcers, and I could understand why.  They were good back in the 1990s when they teamed with Skip and Pete.  Now?  They try to be a comedy act more than calling the game.  Ernie, Skip, and Pete knew how to struck the balance.

Today, Ernie Johnson’s son, Ernie Jr., works with the NBA & the NCAA tournament on TNT Sports.  Skip’s son Chip works as a Braves’ Broadcaster, just like his father & grandfather before him.  Ernie Jr. is more showman than his dad was.  Chip seems to have found a nice niche after a show stint as host of Fox’s Saturday Baseball.  The shadows of their ancestor’s still loom large over them, but they are finding their own way.

Ernie Sr., Skip, and Pete may be gone, but they will never be forgotten.  It is my hope that when John Smoltz goes into the Baseball Hall of Fame next year, he won’t be the only long-time Atlanta Brave going into Cooperstown… Time to honor three Broadcasting pioneers posthumously.